Tuesday, September 25, 2007

Our House

I found this drawing in Emmy's back yard today.

From: Katy
Subject: house question
Date: September 24, 2007 5:34:31 PM PDT
To: Linda

Did you really used to hate your house? What happened? I know you've worked a lot on it, but what else, what happened? What's the story of the transformation?

Yes Katy, I hated my house for years. Remember when you asked if you could come visit and I said no? It was because I was so depressed about our house.

When we first moved, I felt deceived. There were 26 bids on this house. It was a rat's nest. But a cheap rat's nest compared to others on the market. I remember when the moving van arrived, the driver was shocked that we had voluntarily left our home in TN to move into this one.

It was dirty and nicotine-stained. The yard was impossible. There was a funny smell, and months later it turned out that an animal (a cat) had been trapped and had died between the floor of the house and the ceiling of the basement. It was two years (?) before the inside was livable, though we lived in the house that whole time. Not a big deal when you think about what others in the world are going through, but ...

What I found out about myself was that I'm not able to see the beauty around me unless I have a place to live where I feel at home. This is a terrible weakness, to be sure. It took me five years to feel at home here.

About three years ago I began to see the beauty around me. I love our house now. We live in one of the most beautiful places on earth. But here's a reminder of what our house was like for quite a while.